|Thursday, November 24th, 2016|
so today was for the most part pretty good in terms of handling this crush. Throughout the day, i realized that i can't keep going on like this due to my handling of my first ex. Almost seems like it was 10yrs wasted over my insecurities. so now that i'm more comfortable under my own skin, i know better than to keep dwelling on this crush. or I am at least aware of what it is doing to me. having this constantly on my mind is preventing me from living in the moment; i keep fantasizing about something that may not ever happen. and it seems likely that i won't ever happen.
so how i see it or think of it, she was feeling me out the day she came to my desk and we talked about my dog, Picasso, who recently passed away at the time, and how she mentioned her ex when she had to put her dog down around valentine's day this year. it seemed like she was seeing if i liked her or not. i wasn't too expressive as i can be good at being expressionless at times. so she was probably under the impression that i didn't have any interest in her. possibly. truth is, i wasn't trying to pursue her because of how closely i worked with her. And considering how my past dating experience is, we may not have a lasting relationship which would than strain our work relationship. this was something i was not wanting to try, considering i get weirded out about stuff like this.
so the next week after she was feeling me out, she mentioned she was going out with her boyfriend (which i discuss two posts earlier). so i'm thinking she wanted to see where i stood before she committed to this other guy when she came to may desk just a week prior! of course, i could be completely wrong, but that's what's going thru my mind.
so now she's in what could be a great relationship. but then comes the news where she will be moving to another program early next year. this coupled with the phone calls i got from her while she was on the east coast (which i discuss in my previous post). so i'm thinking if i were to try something, it would be when she moves to the other program because i won't be interfacing with her on a daily basis anymore. but, that idea seemed to go crashing down because i didn't feel much of a connection yesterday when i chatted with her at her desk, two days before thanksgiving.
so now, i'm at a point where i understand i may need to let go of this crush. or perhaps the timing is just not right. hard to except. so she is off all of next week. at least i won't be seeing her. maybe that's a good thing. we'll see how i feel and react when she returns. it may be telling how she feels when or if she shows me her pictures. just maybe. we shall see... Current Mood: better
|Thursday, August 20th, 2015|
|Answer for question 4489.
Do you ever have problems sleeping? What do you do in order to fall back to sleep? What sleep aid products do you find most helpful, if any?
depends on the reason why i feel like i can't sleep.
1) if i feel like i should be sleeping but don't feel tired enough, i'll read a book.
2) If i try going to sleep, but feel kinda hungry, i'll drink a glass of milk
3) if i hear noise from tv in a different room, birds chirping, or neighbors doing yard work, i'll put in ear plugs
|Tuesday, August 4th, 2015|
|Answer for question 4476.
Name your top three musical artists of all time (individuals or bands). Why do you love them so much? What song would you pick from each of them that you feel is their best work?
built to spill. song: carry the zero. the guitar work alone does it for me.
neko case. song: star witness. voice, backing harmonies, and guitar work.
belle & sebastian. album: tiger milk. mellow and melodic
|Sunday, February 17th, 2013|
slight hive on the right left arm after dinner.
Dinner on 2/12/13: Pho: rice noodle, beef, been sprouts, basil, green onion
|Sunday, February 10th, 2013|
after eating some Lay's Sour Cream & Onion chips, broke out with a couple hives at the same places as before on the right arm; bicep and elbow area.
|Saturday, February 2nd, 2013|
|Hive Breakout #2
Second documentation of meal that caused breakout of hives on right arm.
Restaurant: El Tlacoyo
|Hive Breakout #1
Started breaking out with hives after thanksgiving. started a couple days after i had the stomach bug/flu. had some some from kathleen at the tempe house. i think it was a chicken noodle soup. do not know the indgrediants. i've been getting hives every so often. here's the first time i documented the meal i had just prior to breakout in hopes of finding the allergen. Meal had on day of or before 1/5/13.
Caramel (sugar with fish sauce and other liquids)
Broke out with a couple hives on right arm, inner side near elbow
|Friday, September 21st, 2012|
|day 33 (thursday)
morning grogginess: struggled getting outta bed. wondering if it was because i ate kinda late (~9:15p). or the beer i had? or work-related stress?
breakfast: cereal, coffee
lunch: pot stickers, steamed veggies
dinner: one and a half bison burgers, chips, beer
|day 32 (wednesday)
morning grogginess: the pizza i had the night before really messed with me trying to wake up. i think i snoozed for about 40 minutes.
lunch: chicken teriyaki with california roll, a couple small snickers bars
dinner: 5 rolled black bean tacos, 1 beer
|Tuesday, September 18th, 2012|
|day 31 (tuesday)
morning grogginess: so i went to sleep at around 12:30a last night. a little later than i'd liked, but i just wasn't tired enough to sleep earlier. ended up rolling outta bed at about 8a. again, a little later than i'd like, but i slept late.
breakfast: 3 mini pound cakes, coffee
lunch: 1 beef/bean burrito (Trader Joe's)
dinner: slice of Italia pizza (vegetarian) with 1 beer. had this at about 9:15p. It's 10:50p right now and i'm still feeling stuffed. should've ate less, but i forgot how late it was
|Monday, September 17th, 2012|
|day 30 (monday)
okay, so i skipped a couple days. whoop.
had four beers saturday night. two of them were IPA's. yikes. woke up 9:15 the next day.
okay for today, monday...
morning grogginess: pretty typical monday. although a little worse than last week. i'm sure the saturday night drinking didn't help.
breakfast: cereal, coffee
lunch: left over spaghetti from last night's dinner. 3 of the mini pound cakes from Lee Lee's. a handful of pistachios
dinner: fish burrito from Taquito Jalisco.....the BEST!!!
|Saturday, September 15th, 2012|
|day 27 (friday)
morning grogginess: so i had the veggie pizza last night with a beer. also had some chips and salsa. i'm going to put this one on stress. i just didn't want to get outta bed. ended up rolling out at about 8:20.
lunch: 5 rolled tacos (black bean)
dinner: 3 chicken tenders at about 7p. 1 beer. then had some canh khoai sot at anh thanh's with a second beer.
|Friday, September 14th, 2012|
|day 26 (thursday)
morning grogginess: so maybe i shouldn't have had that double double. i had it about 8:30p. then drove for about an hour and a half up to mesa. had a beer when i got home at about 11p. ended up going to bed at around 12:30a. despite the burger being a relatively small meal, i felt a little more groggy than i expected. so aside from the quantity of food consumed the night before, the quality definately plays a role i'd say....quality being less meats.
breakfast: banana, coffee
lunch: pot stickers, steamed veggies (chips and salsa)
dinner: lavosh pizza from Pita jungle (vegetarian)
|Thursday, September 13th, 2012|
|day 25 (wednesday)
morning grogginess: so yeah, i should've known what to expect from eating the chicken sandwich with curly fries from Native last night. this morning, i didn't want to leave bed. although i did wake up at 6:30a for no apparent reason.
breakfast: banana, coffee
lunch: bean & cheese burrito with rice and potato. had 3 fun size snickers bars mid-afternoon
dinner: double double animal style (In n' Out) Had this at about 8:30 in tucson just before heading up to Mesa after work. Had a beer when i got home at about 10:30p.
|day 24 (tuesday)
morning grogginess: can't remember. must've been nothing extreme.
breakfast: leftover pasta salad from Dilly's Deli
lunch: subway club, with pickle (from dilly's deli). had 4 fun size snicker's bars in the evening.
dinner: chicken club sandwich with curly fries from Native New Yorker w/ one tall beer.
|Monday, September 10th, 2012|
|day 23 (monday)
morning grogginess: had the alarm set at 7:30a. rolled outta bed at about 7:50. Pretty pretty good considering it was a Monday. I guess waking up at about 8a to feed the dogs this past weekend helped maintain my sleep cycle.
Breakfast: bowl of cereal, coffee
Lunch: Reuben sandwich from Dilly's Deli (some Salt & Vinegar chips during the US OPEN match)
Dinner: Black Bean burrito from Trader Joe's, 1 beer
|day 22 (sunday)
forgot to post last night. argg. was a bit exhaust having to house/dog sit for Dan this weekend up till this morning. US Open Men's Final today. brother texted me at 4:45p about it. totally forgot about til he mentioned it. so i stopped work for a bit to watch the match. pretty damn good. Djokavic vs Murray. Murray takes it in 5 sets. in almost 5hrs!
Grogginess: not too bad considering i had to wake up somewhat early to go to Dan's house to let the dogs out and feed them. I think i rolled outta bed at about 8:15a.
Breakfast: Left over dim sum from Saturday (seafood dumpling, sticky rice)
Lunch: Hummus with pita chips
Dinner: 5 rolled tacos (Trader Joe's, black bean), 1 beer
|Sunday, September 9th, 2012|
|day 21 (saturday)
watching US Open Women's Final. 3rd set. Azeranka (1) up against Serena Williams (4).
Morning Grogginess: Maybe because i was a bit stressed from work. or the fries i had for dinner. maybe the butter on the bread/toast on the veggie burger. but ended getting outta bed at about 8:45am.... a little later than i'd like. Can't remember if i set the alarm for 7:30 or not.
Lunch: Dim Sum
Dinner: Guacamole dip. Crab tostada. Fish taco. some beans/rice. 24oz of beer.
|Friday, September 7th, 2012|
okay, went to bed a little late last night because of the show at the Crescent. Unfortunately i forgot to set the alarm (to 7:30) and ended up waking up at 8:50a. considering the crazy week, i didnt' care.
morning grogginess: maybe because im stressed, i did not want to wake up. and because it was cloudy out, it seemed earlier than normal, so that may have had an effect on me. i'll admit, the morning was a little slow though. started eating my cereal on the couch rather at my desk. now that's a first.
breakfast: cereal, coffee
lunch: 2 chimichangas, hummus and pita chips
dinner: veggie burger with fries at Mad Hatter w/ 2 beers
i'm beat. simply beat. exhausted from work and just played a show at the Crescent tonight.
morning grogginess: almost the same as the last few days. woke up not so tired, but also not wide-eyed and awake. actually snoozed for about 10 minutes bc there was no rush to get to work (working from home today)
Breakfast: cereal, coffee
Lunch: Ramen with mushroom, tomato, and egg
Dinner: 3 beers and some hummus dip. i would have a larger meal but i wasn't free until after the show which was about 11:30p. and i didn't want a big meal before bed. the hummus will hold me off till manana.